


How do you spell 'I hate you?'

by Star_fighter111



Category: South Park
Genre: Abuse, Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Awkward First Times, Cutting, Depression, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Manipulation, Out of Character, POV Kyle Broflovski, References to Drugs, Sleep Deprivation, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2019-10-27 06:43:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17761781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Star_fighter111/pseuds/Star_fighter111
Summary: ???: Hey, this is Stan???: Wendy, if you're reading this, you're a stuck up bitch.???: And you're manipulative, but I love you???: And I think I should go away from your life???:  When I'm gone, don't look for me, you'll realize I'm dead???: Shit, I just realized I told you???: Doesn't matter nowKyle: Hold up!Kyle: HOld THe FUCk Up!_____orStan screws up Wendy's phone number and sends it to Kyle





	1. First time meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I messed with their ages again  
> Stan: 16  
> Kyle: 17  
> Kenny: 20  
> Butters: 16  
> Wendy: 16  
> Cartman: 21  
> Tweek: 16  
> Token: 17  
> Craig: 16  
> and I also messed with school thing because when you're 16 you're in your second last or third last year of high school, but whatever. This is fiction and whatever I say goes.

_12:06 AM_

**???:** Hey, this is Stan

**???:** Wendy, if you're reading this, you're a stuck up bitch.

**???:** And you're manipulative, but I love you

**???:** And I think I should go away from your life

**???:** When I'm gone, don't look for me, you'll realize I'm dead

**???:** Shit, I just realized I told you

**???:** Doesn't matter now

_12:10 AM_

_You have 7 new messages_

**Kyle:** Hold up!

**Kyle:** HOld THe FUCk Up!

**Kyle:** ARe YoU TheEre?

**Kyle:** HelLo

**Kyle:** HellO

**Kyle:** ThS ISN't Wnedy

**Kyle:** ShE SoUNDs LiKE A BiTcH

**???:** Oh, I'm sorry for contacting you.  It must've been a mistake

**Kyle:** No, no it's fine

**???:** No, I shouldn't have even texted her, it'd be better if I just offed myself without telling anyone.

**Kyle:** Can you continue talking with me?

**???:** Why would you want that?

**Kyle:** Because I'm bored and I want to make sure you're okay

**???:** Interesting...

**Kyle:** I'm Kyle, I'm a student studying at Stanford, I'm learning Law

**???:** Oh, you're older than me

**Kyle:** I might not be, I graduated high school early

**???:** How old are you?

**Kyle:** I'm 17

**???:** No shit?  I'm still younger, I'm 16

**Kyle:** Oh, what's your name?

**???:** Stan, I'm in my last year of high school in South Park, Colorado.

_Change Name to **Stan**? ( **Y/** N)_

**Kyle:** That's a small town right?

**Stan:** Yeah, it gets pretty boring

**Kyle:** I always wanted to live in a small town...

**Stan:** you really don't, it get boring 

**Kyle:** Oh, I was born in New Jersey

**Kyle:** On the bad part, I'm surprised I turned out alright

**Stan:** Really?

**Kyle:** Yeah, I have to get to classes though.  Let's talk again?

**Stan:** Sure

_Kenny_

Those girls were HOT!

_Cartman_

Fuck off, fatass

**_Stan_ **

**Sure**

_3:15 AM_

**Kyle:** Hey, I'm out of school, areyou

_3:20 AM_

**Stan:** Yeah, I didn't know UNI students get out the same time we do

**Kyle:** We don't it varies every day

**Stan:** That must hard to remember

**Kyle:** A little bit

**Stan:** What is it like in UNI

**Kyle:** Mentally straining, but you meet a lot of cool kids there

**Stan:** Can you tell me some people you met there?

**Kyle:** Sure

**Kyle:** There's this kid, Kenny

**Kyle:** He worked his ass off to get here

**Kyle:** He was poor so he had to get a scholarship

**Kyle:**  he's a player but my best dude, always tells the funniest jokes and somehow always finds himself with drugs  

**Kyle:** Then there are the teachers who are funny and very logical

**Stan:** Kenny sounds like a popular kid

**Kyle:** He sort've is but no one really likes him

**Stan:** What do you mean?

**Kyle:** I told you he's a player, a fuck boi, but that's only the likable thing anyone ever sees.  

**Kyle:** Other than that, everyone sees him as a poor, nobody.  Which he isn't

**Stan:** Oh, wow

**Kyle:** Yeah, so what's High School like in a small town?

**Stan:** It's...

**Stan:** Different?

**Stan:** I mean, word spreads around like wildfire

**Stan:** She slept around with him, what a slut

**Stan:** No way?  He can't be gay?  

**Stan:** Have you heard that she is a prostitute and will give a blowjob for 5?  and the real thing for 60?

**Kyle:** Damn, that sucks.

**Stan:** It does...

**Kyle:** Is there any positive things there?

**Stan:** There's  a guy named Butters

**Kyle:** Butters?

**Stan:** Well, his real name is Leopold but everyone calls him Butters

**Stan:** He's too innocent and lets everyone walk all over him

**Kyle:** Oh...

**Stan:** But he's really nice, and he has your back in rough times

**Kyle:** That's nice

**Stan:** And then there's Wendy

**Stan:** She's amazing, nothing is wrong with her

**Kyle:** Is she your girlfriend?

**Stan:** yeah, but it's an on-off thing

**Kyle:** Sorry

**Stan:** it's fine, anyway, she helps me get through rough times

**Kyle:** That's nice

**Stan:** What about you?  Any relationships?

**Kyle:** Nah, no one here is pretty

**Stan:** that's shallow

**Kyle:** Eh, they also mean?

**Stan:** better


	2. Chapter 2

  _3:36 AM_

 **Stan:** Are you there?

_You have 1 new message_

_Kenny_

I know, you told me 15 times

_Cartman_

EH! I'M NOT FAT

_**Stan** _

_**better** _

_3:40 AM_

**Kyle:** Yeah, what's Up?

 **Stan:** Who is this?

 **Kyle:** Umm...

 **Stan:** Oh, sorry, it's a different person

 **Kyle:** Makes sense... I'm Kyle

 **Stan:** I wouldn't get too involved with Stan, he's a little bit sad

 **Kyle:** I know

 **Stan:** Okay, look, here's my contact info and I'll tell you there 18002423223

 **Kyle:**...

 **Stan:** I'm Craig, just i'll tell you why you shouldn't get involved with him, he's coming now.

_Add new Contact_

_FUcking BiTch_

 

**FUcking BiTch**

Stan

I'm Craig, just i'll tell you why you shouldn't get involved with him, he's coming now

_Kenny_

I know, you told me 15 times

_Cartman_

EH! I'M NOT FAT

3:43

 **Kyle:** Okay, tell me

 **FUcking BiTch:** He has mental problems

 **Kyle:** I know, that's how we kinda met

 **FUcking BiTch:** He becomes really clingy

 **Kyle:** That's fine

 **FUcking BiTch:** He'll text you in the middle of the night

 **Kyle:** I usually pull all nighters

 **FUcking BiTch:** He might start to annoy you

 **Kyle:** I think I have more annoying people in my life

 **Kyle:** Look, you're only pointing out the things that are negative

 **FUcking BiTch:** I know but he makes friends easily and they leave him so I didn't want that to happen again

_Change name to **Craig**? ( **Y** /N)_

**Kyle:** Oh...

 **Craig:** I swear if you start being mean to him, I'll go to Harvard myself and beat the fuck out of you

 **Kyle:** Its Stanford but whatever, who cares right?

_You have 3 new messages_

_Craig_

It's Stanford but whatever, who cares right?

**_Stan:_ **

**_Please answer_ **

_Kenny_

I know, you told me 15 times

_Cartman_

EH! I'M NOT FAT

_3:46_

**Stan:** I'm sorry if Craig said anything mean to you

 **Stan:** you're not going to leave. are you

 **Stan:** Please answer

 **Kyle:** No, I'm not going to leave you

 **Stan:** Well, I mean, its fine if you want, we only knew each other since yesterday

 **Kyle:** Nah, I think I'll stick around longer

 **Stan:** Okay

 **Kyle:** So, tell me about yourself

 **Stan:** Me?

 **Kyle:** Yeah, likes dislikes

 **Stan:** oh

 **Stan:** I like video games, pizza and I dislike studying and all those tv shows that are supposed to have drama in but it's really teen drama

 **Kyle:** Yeah, I hate those to

 **Stan:** What about you?  When you get a day off, what do you do

 **Kyle:** That's easy, I watch movies

 **Kyle:** Study for shit I have to do for school

 **Kyle:** And now, I'll probably talk to you

 **Stan:** Oh

 **Kyle:** I should go, Cartman is doing stupid shit again

 **Stan:** Okay.. bye

_Cartman_

You are fat and don't fucking talk about Jewish people again

_Kenny_

Yeah, but they were hot!  Did you hear about what Cartman did?

**Stan**

**Okay.. bye**

_4:50_

**Kyle:** Hello, sorry about that, Cartman is a dick _  
_

 **Stan:** Who's Cartman?

 **Kyle:** oh

 **Kyle:** He's a racist, homophobic, sexist, retard

 **Stan:** Damn..

 **Stan:** What'd he do?

 **Kyle:** Tried to start another holocaust 

 **Stan:** what the fuck

 **Kyle:** He probably just hates me, wonder why he hangs out with me?

 **Stan:** You're Jewish

 **Kyle:** Yep

 **Stan:** That's sweet

 **Kyle:** Nice

 **Kyle:** you're having to do exams soon, right?

 **Stan:** Don't remind me

 **Kyle:** I can always help study

 **Stan:** how?

 **Kyle:** There's such thing as calling

 **Stan:** Oh, right

 **Kyle:** Unless you don't want to, that's fine

 **Stan:** No, that's fine, you're in Harvard basically

 **Kyle:** Stanford but whatever

 **Kyle:** When are your exams?

 **Stan:** Sorry

 **Stan:** In a couple a month or two

 **Kyle:** I can help tomorrow, around 3:45?  So 4:45 for you?

 **Stan:** Sure

 **Kyle:** Sweet

 **Stan:** Bye

 **Kyle:** Yeah

_Cartman_

Who are you talking to?

_Kenny_

Who are you always texting with

_**Stan** _

_**Yeah** _

_3:40_

**Kyle:** Are you there?

_3:42_

**Stan:** Yeah, do you want to call now?

 **Kyle:** sure

_Incoming call_

_Stan_

**_Answer_ ** _Decline_

______________________

 

Kyle heard a little sigh.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is going to get dark... but not as dark as my other book, that one was weird and I don't know why I made everyone die...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate the last chapter but I forgot how to delete it without erasing everything so oh well? And I'm not in high school yet, so I have no idea how exams work so I will bluff my way through it!

There was a long silence until Kyle finally spoke up, "Um, Stan?"  A voice came on the other side of the line, "Yeah, Kyle, right?"  Kyle nodded, "Yep, what do you want to do first for the exams."  Kyle heard rustling on the other side before a small, "Yeah, can we do English?" 

Kyle didn't know a lot about English but knew the gist of it.  He asked Stan what Stan wrote down on his paper.  He'd correct him if he knew something was off.  They spent a couple of hours on that, his dad coming in once wondering why Stan was talking.  He told him he was talking to a friend and studying for exams.  The dad left as Kyle smiled softly.  He lived alone in a really cramped, tight apartment building.  He moved out young. 

"Kyle? Kyle?"  Stan asked and Kyle nodded, "Yeah, I'm here," he paused remembering what was happening, "Are you alright with English?" Stan responded, "Yeah, thanks."  Kyle smiled, "Anytime, do you want to work on math now?"  There was a pause, "That's fine, I think I'm going to sleep a little."  Kyle nodded, "Okay, that's fine, talk later?"  There was a silent, "Yeah." 

 _Your call has been disconnected_  

That was weird...

_Kenny_

none of your business

_Cartman_

Don't fucking start

_Stan_

Sure

**_Craig_ **

**It's Stanford but whatever, who cares right?**

_6:30_

**Kyle:**  Could you check on Stan?

_6:50_

**Craig:** Why?

 **Kyle:** I talked to him on the phone and at the end, he seemed distant.

 **Craig:** Don't worry about it, it's probably his fucking girlfriend

 **Kyle:** Whats wrong with his girlfriend?

 **Craig:** I shouldn't tell you that

 **Kyle:** Fine

_You have 5 new messages_

_Kenny_

Come on, bro, tell me!  is it your girlfriend?  My baby is growing up

_Cartman_

The fuck man?  I tried to be a good friend but you shut me down?

**_Stan_ **

**I'm sorry**

_11:20_

**Stan:** sorry for ending our call so abruptly

 **Stan:** Are you there

 **Stan:** Please answer

 **Stan:** If you're mad at me that's fine 

 **Stan:** I'm sorry

_11:25_

**Kyle:** I'm not mad, it was fine

 **Kyle:** Are you okay?

 **Stan:** Yeah, don't worry 

 **Kyle:** What do you think worried about

 **Stan:** I don't know

 **Kyle:** Ithinkyoudo

 **Kyle:** butnevermind

 **Stan:** oh

 **Kyle:** do you usually stay up this late?

 **Stan:** Up at 12?

 **Stan:** Yeah, I heard from Craig you pull all nighter all the time

 **Stan:** don't your parents make you go to sleep

 **Kyle:** Nah, I moved out

 **Kyle:** Now I have a cramped living space

 **Stan:** Oh, I'm sorry

 **Kyle:** oh don't say sorry

 **Kyle:** its nothing you can't change

 **Stan:** I'm still sorry

 **Kyle:** Thanks

 **Stan:** Don't you have exams?

 **Kyle:** Yeah, but I already did them

 **Stan:** That fast?

 **Stan:** wow

 **Kyle:** I hope I passed

 **Stan:** I'm sure you will

 **Kyle:** ~~If I don't pass I will quit~~

 **Kyle:**  Thank you

 **Stan:** What do you look like?

 **Kyle:** Oh, I have green eyes, red hair?

 **Stan:** Oh, I have blue eyes and black hair, if we're doing basic things.

 **Kyle** **:** ok then

 **Kyle:** I have paler skin, but not that pale

 **Kyle:** I am short, I guess

 **Kyle:** I don't have many muscles

 **Kyle:** Now you go

 **Stan:** Ok

 **Stan:** I am caucasian 

 **Stan:** I am taller

 **Stan:** I'm a quarterback

 **Stan:**  My birthday is October 19

 **Stan:** And, I think that's it

 **Kyle:** Oh, you're birthday is in a month

 **Stan:** I guess so

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

_You have 1 new message_

12:09 AM

 **Stan:** Are you there?

_Kenny_

Haha, not a girlfriend

_Cartman_

You suck at being a good friend

_**Stan** _

**Are you there?**

12:13 AM

 **Kyle:** Yep, what's up?

 **Stan:** Oh, 

 **Kyle:** Are you okay?

 **Stan:** Ye

 **Kyle:** Stan?

 **Kyle:** Are you safe?

 **Kyle:** Stan?

 **Kyle:** Are you okay

 **Kyle:** ArRE YoU OKAy

 **Kyle:** STAn

 **Kyle:** StN

 **Kyle:** PLeaSe AnsWer

12:15

 **Stan:** I'm here

 **Stan:** I had to talk to Wendy

 **Kyle:** Are you okay?

 **Kyle:** what did Wendy say?

 **Stan:** Oh

 **Stan:** She said I should pay more attention to her and accused me of cheating 

 **Stan:** Everyone says she's cheating on me but I don't think so

 **Stan:** and that we're in a toxic relationship

 **Stan:** I wonder why

 **Kyle:** Oh

 **Kyle:** I hope everything turns out alright

 **Kyle:** If you need someone, I'm here

 **Stan:** Thanks

 **Stan:** You're a good friend, even though it's only been like, 2 weeks

 **Kyle:** That's sweet 

 **Kyle:** Can I ask something

 **Stan:** yeah

 **Kyle:** Can we send a picture of ourselves?

 **Stan:** Yeah, sure

 **Kyle:** I'll do it too,

 **Kyle:** Ijustwanttoknowthefaceofthepersonimtexting

 **Stan:** um, ok

 **Stan:** {Insert Picture}

 **Kyle:** ~~damn~~

 **Kyle:** nice

 **Kyle:** {Instert Picture}

 **Stan:** You look hot, lolol

 **Kyle** : haha, thanks

 **Stan:** No homo, though

 **Kyle:** ~~yes homo~~

 **Kyle:**  yeah, no homo

 **Stan:** haha

 **Kyle:** We should go to bed now

 **Stan:** yeah, see ya later

You _have 1 new message_

_9:30_

_Cartman_

You fucking Jew!  

_Kenny_

Damn, and here I thought you were growing up

**_Stan_ **

**_I'm sorry about yesterday_ **

9:36

 **Kyle:** it's fine, at least I could help

 **Stan:** Yeah

 **Stan:** Are you in school?

 **Kyle:** Not yet

 **Stan:** Oh, that's cool

 **Kyle:** I guess

**Kyle:** ~~your birthday is in a week~~

**Stan:** So, what are you doing?

 **Kyle:** talking to you lolol

 **Stan:** Haha, yeah

**Kyle:** ~~loveyou~~

**Kyle:** I need to go

 **Stan:** um, sure

 **Kyle:** It's not you, i cant

 **Stan:** Are you okay?

_You have 5 new messages_

9:35

_**Stan** _

_**was it something I said** _

_Kenny_

I heard what you did, are you okay

_Cartman_

Wow, that must've been embarrassing

9:45

 **Stan:** Are you okay?

 **Stan:** is something wrong

 **Stan:** did I do something

 **Stan:** Im sorry

 **Stan:** was it something I said

 **Kyle:** No, it wasn't you

 **Kyle:** it was me, i felt sick

 **Stan:** Are you okay now?

 **Kyle:** Yeah, I think i'll be fine

 **Kyle:** I just vomited in front of the campus

 **Stan:** wow, that sucks

 **Kyle:** yeah, it does suck

 **Kyle:** but I'll get through it


	5. Chapter 5

_You have 2 new messages_

12:06 PM 

_Kenny_

Yeah, I mean, I almost...

_Cartman_

Don't talk about it, dipshit

_**Stan** _

_**Kyle?** _

**Stan:** You okay?

 **Stan:** Kyle?

12:10

 **Kyle:** Yeah, just, you know, had to be sent home

 **Stan:** that sucks

 **Kyle:** I guess, it doesn't really matter

 **Kyle:** I mean, it happened so

 **Stan:** Ok

 **Kyle:** Anyway, how was school?

 **Stan:** It was fine

 **Stan:** have some homework, how about you?

 **Kyle:** I had to be in a partnership with Cartman, he's an asshole, I might have told you about him

 **Stan:** That sucks, but what can we do?

 **Kyle:** Yeah, which high school do you go to?

 **Stan:** South Park High 

~~very original A/N~~

**Kyle:** that's cool

 **Stan:** Maybe

 **Kyle:** Sure

 **Stan:** We should meet sometime?

**Kyle:** ~~funny you should say that~~

**Kyle:** Yeah, we should, that'd be fun

 **Kyle:** I have somethign to say

 **Stan:** are you okay?

 **Kyle:** yea

 **Stan:** ok, what is it?

**Kyle:** ~~Ithinki'mfallinginlovewithYoU~~

**Kyle:** it's nothing really

 **Kyle:** just I might not have a lot of time to visit

 **Stan:** oh

 **Stan:** That's cool

 **Kyle:** sorry, uni is becoming stressful

 **Stan:** That's understandable

'what the fuck did I just say?  I'm on top of my work' Kyle thought

 **Stan:** um, sorry if i had made you uncomfortable

 **Kyle:** Nah

 **Kyle:** I just can't do it this week

 **Stan:** yeah, ok

 **Stan:** I have to go now, the bell rang

 **Kyle:** Ok, see ya

_You have 2 new messages_

_Kenny_

_We have a test to study for, right?_

_Cartman_

I think we should do what I suggested for our project

**_Stan_ **

**_Hey_ **

5:07

 **Stan:** Hey

5:30

 **Kyle:** hey

 **Kyle:** did you finish school?

 **Stan:** Yeah, it was cool

 **Stan:** Craig and Tweek went on a date and I was the third wheel

 **Stan:** Token showed me a band

 **Kyle:** that's cool, sucks that you were the third wheel

 **Kyle:** Do you like reading?

 **Stan:** Not much, i find it boring

 **Kyle:** that's cool, I read from time to time

 **Stan:** It's october now, it's almost halloween

 **Kyle:** and your birthday

 **Stan:** oh

 **Stan:** you still remember that

 **Kyle:** yeah, you told me

 **Stan:** I thought you would've forgotten that

 **Kyle:** I'll give you something for your birthday

 **Stan:** but we live, like, 2 hours away from me?

**Kyle:** ~~Maybe~~

**Kyle:** I would if I lived closer to you

 **Stan:** thanks 

 **Kyle:** what are friends for

 **Stan:** I guess

**Kyle:** ~~Ispentalotofmymoneytobuyaplanetickettocomeseeyou~~

**Stan:** is University hard

 **Kyle:** yeah, but it'll be worth it

 **Stan:** how so

 **Kyle:** in the long term, it'll work out

 **Stan:** are you having fun? 

 **Kyle:** Yeah

 **Kyle:** I guess

 **Stan:** You should have fun

 **Stan:** I heard when you're in university, you should have fun

 **Kyle:** I know

 **Stan:** No really, have fun

 **Stan:** because once you're out of university, you'll get a job

 **Stan:** and you might get a good job but it won't be fun and you'll look back to your university days and wished you had more fun

 **Kyle:** damn

 **Kyle:** Ok, I'll have more fun whilst studying

 **Stan:** good

**Kyle:** ~~loveyou~~

**Kyle:** You should have fun too

 **Stan:** oh

 **Stan:** yeah

 **Stan:** i'll do that

 **Kyle:**  I think when we meet, we'll get along well

 **Stan:** if

 **Kyle:** what do you mean

 **Stan:** I mean, you're busy with school and I don't think i'll live long

 **Kyle:** why do you think that

 **Stan:** I've been diagnosed with depression, it's getting worse

 **Kyle:** oh god

 **Kyle:** do not kill yourself, you may feel like you're alone in this world, but you're not

 **Kyle:** this pain won't last, the pain will tell you it will last

 **Kyle:** Pain lies, ignore it

 **Kyle:** Pain is a debt, paid off in time

 **Kyle:** you might be stuck here for awhile

 **Kyle:** but the world isn't going anywhere, hang on in there if you can

 **Stan:**...

 **Stan:** you have a way with words

 **Kyle:** I've always been told that, but this isn't about me

 **Kyle:** Are you okay?  Are you in danger

 **Stan:** No, i'm fine now

 **Kyle:** that's awesome

 **Stan:** I hope I live long enough to meet you

 **Kyle:** and longer

 **Stan:** we'll see

 **Kyle:** i guess so

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That thing where Kyle is telling Stan to not kill himself, yeah I stole that from the internet! Just pretend in this universe that book doesn't exist, I'm too lazy to think of an original speech, maybe when I feel more motivated, I'll do it, but not right now.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan's POV instead of Kyle's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ!!! 
> 
> Ok, so I am going in depth with things, panic attacks and the first day, you're going to see a side of my writing that I haven't written before. And I have an idea of what to do. I have never had a panic attack before as I am younger than most. So if I made any mistakes, tell me and I'll get rid of it. And I know this is triggering for a lot of people, and I get it if you can't read on. 
> 
> Stay safe, stay strong.

Stan was in his room at 9:30 PM.  He was watching YouTube videos and not expecting anything to happen.  The day was okay, he talked Bebe, Butters didn't get walked all over on, he got a good grade on his test.  Wendy didn't yell.  It was an okay day.  Until he had gotten a call from Wendy.  

She started, "Were you talking to Bebe?"  Stan slowly exclaimed, "Yeah."  He was unsure of himself at this point, the day was going a little bit too well.  Wendy sighed, "Don't talk to Bebe again, she's a dirty slut."  Stan looked downwards and asked, "Why?  She is a cool kind of girl."  Wendy went silent for a second or two but to Stan, it felt like a minute, "Are you cheating on me"  Stan opened his mouth to say something but shut it.  He opened it again and responded, "No, I would never."  Stan could hear the smile in her voice, "You love me right?"  Stan nodded, thinking that Wendy might drop it, "Of course I do."  Wendy continued, "And you want to prove to me that you still do love me right?"  Stan said, "Yes, I would do anything."  Wendy stated, "Then stop talking to Bebe."  Stan looked to his computer, "Okay."  Wendy said, "That's a good boyfriend."  Stan smiled, "Okay, Stan, I have to go, got some homework to catch up on."  Stan nodded and the call ended. 

He went back to the YouTube video he was watching.  By the end of it, he rethought the conversation and shut his computer really hard.  Why couldn't he say anything about the rumours about her cheating on him?  Everyone says that, even Craig.  He got on his phone and was about to call Wendy again and tell her about all those rumours.  If she can accuse him of cheating why can't he do the same?  He was about to call her, he had his finger hovering over the button, but he couldn't.  He didn't want to.  Not again.  Last time, they broke up for a month.  He threw his phone across his bed and covered his face in his pillow.  

The next day, he talked to Tweek, Craig, Token, Butters and Wendy.  The guys never really liked her.  He always wondered why.  She looked at him, "Have you talked to Bebe?"  Craig silently paid attention.  Stan nodded his head, "Good, oh and I bought a new phone, I'll give you my new number at the end of the day."  Stan nodded once again and she left to go see some guy.  Stan focused on all the guys again, "Dude, why can't you talk to Bebe anymore?  You guys got along."  Stan shrugged, "Wendy was thinking I was cheating on her with Bebe and I didn't want that."  Token sighed, "That's not a healthy relationship."  Craig nodded along with Tweek.  Stan asked, "Then what is?"  Tweek responded to that, "You'll know when you find one."  

Stan shrugged thinking their relationship was alright.  He didn't see any problem with it.  The bell rang and he had to go.  It sucked that Token had to leave for college.  It had to happen at some point.  

He went inside the school and got bored.  At the end of the day, Wendy did tell him her new phone's number.  She said, right after giving it to him, "I heard you talked to Bebe."  Stan shook his head, "No, only in Science and we were assigned partners.  We only talked about science."  Wendy thought for a bit, "Good because if I know that you're talking to her, I just might kill myself."  Stan's eyes widened, "Baby, I won't."  Wendy nodded and hugged him. 

He went home to type the messily written number down in his phone.  He couldn't tell if the fifth number was five or a two.  It was poorly written and he wondered if he got any numbers mixed up.  He went to his room and thought about the day.  He wished he could tell Wendy all his thoughts.  He wished he wasn't a stuck up bitch.  He wished for lots of things but they won't come true.  He wanted to live without struggle but he's afraid of what he would be without the struggle.  

Thinking that hurts his head.  He laid down on the pillow and started crying.  He didn't know why.  He just started thinking about Wendy and now there are tears.  He felt nauseous, he would've run to the bathroom if he wasn't so tired and didn't feel planted to his bed.  His breath quickened as he looked up at his ceiling.  His throat tightened and he whined, falling off his bed.  

He felt light headed and his chest was filling up with pain.  He knew what this was.  He laid on the floor, tears crawling down his face as everything felt so loud.  He was scared of what would happen if he didn't calm down.  He knew he was having a panic attack.  That was a good sign, he can get out of this.  He closed his eyes and thought of a happy place.  It would have to be his room.  He worked on his breathing and thought of his room being organized.  

He breathed in for five seconds and out for four seconds.  Breathed in a shaky breath and he can't do this.  No, he has too.  Breath in for five and out for four.  After lying on the ground concentrating on something people feel that is natural.  He walked to the bathroom this time and fell to the ground and coughed.  It feels like blood is coming up.  But nothing is crawling in his throat.  

He skipped dinner that day.  When he looked at the time, it was 12:05 AM.  He should tell Wendy what he's feeling.  That's what he should do.  

He got his phone that luckily hasn't been smashed and typed the number.

_Craig_

Dude...

_Tweek_

Lmao

_Token_

That sucks

_Insert number 825-427-6634_

**Stan:** Hey, this is Stan

 **Stan:** Wendy, if you're reading this, you're a stuck up bitch.

 **Stan:** And you're manipulative, but I love you

 **Stan:** And I think I should go away from your life

 **Stan:** When I'm gone, don't look for me, you'll realize I'm dead

 **Stan:** Shit, I just realized I told you

 **Stan:** Doesn't matter now

Stan got up from his bed and thought what to do.  At 12:10 AM he got a text back.  It wasn't from Wendy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the number, kyle's number is a random number, I wouldn't call it unless you want an angry someone yelling at you.


	7. Chapter 7

Stan walked outside with Wendy in hand and wasn't expecting to see what he saw.  It was a guy with red hair, he looked like Kyle.  It was then he noticed, that strange guy was in fact, Kyle.  He let go of Wendy's arm and walked to him and smiled, Kyle stated, "Happy Birthday, Stan."  In which Stan hugged him.  Kyle wrapped his arms around Stan.  After a little bit, Stan looked back and saw Wendy, a little confused.  In which Stan introduced, "Wendy!  This is Kyle, we've been chatting for a while and since it's my birthday, I guess he came to visit."  Wendy smiled and looked at Kyle, "Hello, I'm Wendy, you may or may not know I am Stan's girlfriend."  She finished by latching her arm around Stan's. Kyle nodded, "I know, Stan talks about you sometimes." 

Wendy shook her head and looked at Stan letting go of his arm, "I'm going to go shopping with Bebe, see you later.  I'm guessing you guys would hang out?"  Stan nodded and put his hands in his pocket.  She left and Kyle asked, "Does she know it's your birthday?"  Stan nodded slowing, "Yeah, she just wants to hang out with Bebe."  Kyle nodded and asked, "Now Stan, what is there to do?  Could you show me around your house?  I'd love to get to know you outside of texting."  Stan placed an arm around Kyle's shoulder and started walking, "Sure, it's a little messy though, as I wasn't expecting you."   

Kyle laughed, "Then I will know how messy you are."  He looked around the small town, seeing hills and people driving around.  He has never been to a small town before, always in some populated place.  Like New Jersey or where he is living now.  It was so new to him.  Stan stopped as Kyle kept on going, not noticing Stan has stopped.  

"Um, we're here,"  Stan stated, Kyle turned around and laughed again, "I don't know where you live," Kyle smiled through his words.  Stan shrugged, "I don't know, a habit I guess," Kyle mimicked Stan and shrugged too, going inside the house along with him.  Stan stated closing the door behind him, "My parents come home around 4 or 5 hours, we have some time, I'll show you my room."  Kyle nodded as he looked around.  He saw some posters of bands and his bed.  

"When did you get here and where are you going to stay?"  Stan asked, sitting on the floor beside his bed.  He leaned his head at the top of his bed.

"Yesterday, I wanted it to be a surprise for your birthday and I got a room at a hotel."  Kyle sat on his bed leaning back so his back was on the bed and his head was on beside Stan's head.

Stan said, "That's sweet, how'd you get here?"  Stan looked beside him and Kyle replied, "Oh, I walked, and I swam and ran."  Stan laughed, making his eyes close, "No seriously, did you take the plane?"  Kyle nodded, "I don't remember signing up to be interrogated."   Stan nodded, "Did you sign up for something?"  

Kyle was going to reject that but thought of something, "Oh yeah.  I was told to take care of a guy who lives in South Park, his name is Stan, have you heard of him?"  Stan shook his head, "I can't say I have, I'll have to keep my eyes out for him, if I do see him, I'll tell you."  

Stan turned his head to the right looking at Kyle as Kyle was looking at Stan.  There was a moment of silence, a desire that they didn't know how to solve.  Stan felt something he used to only feel with Wendy.  He doesn't have that feeling with her anymore.  Kyle was feeling the same, wondering where this feeling is from.  

They started to go closer, they didn't even know they were moving.  Kyle opened his mouth until they heard the door open, "Hey honey, who's this?"  Kyle sat up quickly.  Stan looked in front of him and saw his mom.  He replied, "Oh, I thought you come home later, and this is Kyle, Mom. he is visiting."  His mom nodded, his mom was oblivious to what almost happened a couple of seconds ago.  

His mom looked at Kyle, "Well, you're always welcomed here if you're a friend of Stan's.  I'm Sharon, and my husband, Randy will be coming home soon."  Kyle nodded and smiled as she closed the door.  Kyle laid on the pillow instead of half off the bed.  Stan laid beside him, and they watched the sun go down from the window.  Staying in silence as sometimes that was all the comfort someone could need.

Kyle went to his hotel a little after the sun went down.  They hugged and he left.  Kyle left before Randy came home, which Stan was thankful for.  His dad is a drunk and usually is stupid while drunk.  Stan wondered how Kyle's parents are.  He wondered a lot about Kyle.  Who his friends were.  Where he lived, how his school is.  He'll have to wait and see to find all of those things.  

Kyle never talked about his parents, Stan just realized.  Stan looked at his phone and saw missed phone calls and texts from Wendy.  He must have been distracted.  He didn't really want to talk to Wendy right then and there.  He wanted to get the redness from his face gone.  He wondered why it was there.  He didn't like Kyle like that.  It was probably the heat in the house.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a couple of weeks of not updating... haha i can explain. Maybe? No, i can't, everytime i sit down to write this I watch youtube so oh well.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can explain... no, not really but it's summer so expect a lot of updates!!

Kyle was in Stan's room, casually on a bed.  Stan told him to wait as he was getting something.  It was his last day in Colorado until he has to get back to his university.  Stan walked into the room holding a video game package, "I recently just got this.  Since you're leaving soon, we should play it."  Kyle nodded having something on his mind.  Stan put the disc in the console and gave a remote to Kyle, sitting on the bed with an interesting face.  Stan sat beside him and asked, "why that face?"  Kyle wanted to say what was happening in his mind but then he said something different, "oh, I'm just, it's that I'm leaving tomorrow, and it's shit."  Stan nodded, looking at his phone, noticing it's Wendy if Kyle were to guess what it was saying something along the lines of, "Come over, now, or I'll leave you."  Kyle wanted Stan to leave that relationship.  What surprised Kyle, was that Stan muttered both to himself and Kyle that Wendy is a stuck up bitch and he doesn't care about her.  As of the moment.  Stan let his phone drop to the bed and he pressed the play button.  Kyle had an option, tell Stan about his abusive relationship, leave it.  Kyle and Stan were friends, he should say what's happening.  

 

"Stan," Kyle asked softly, afraid of what would happen.  Stan nodded, focusing in on the game.  Kyle sighed, "nevermind, I'll tell you later."  Kyle's focus went back to the game, figuring that he would tell him later.  There was a mumble that sounded like a 'yes' but Kyle wasn't sure.  Kyle's feelings had remained enclosed and stuck inside him.  He couldn't say that when Stan was in a relationship.  Kyle felt a buzz in his left pocket, it repeated until Stan paused the game and asked, "you should get that," Kyle nodded and looked who it was, it was his mom.  Kyle slide his finger across the phone and placed it on his ear with a, "what?"  

 

Stan had known Kyle's relationship with his parents was bad ever since he said that first word. Stan couldn't hear what the other person was saying but he felt awkward as the conversation became heated.  Kyle looked at Stan and mouthed, 'sorry' and pointed outside.  Stan nodded as Kyle left and Stan was left wondering what was happening.  Stan left the tv on and went on his phone, looking on Instagram.  After twenty minutes, Kyle came in, his face was red out of anger and his face was annoyed.  He looked like he was going to cry.  Stan asked, "what's wrong?"  Kyle shook his head and sat down on the bed beside him. Kyle said in his hoarse voice, like he had been yelling, "let's just continue the game." Stan nodded but said, "alright, you sure?" Kyle nodded with tears in his eyes, Kyle didn't want to but he wouldn't say it. Stan nodded and started off the game.

 

After playing the game for a while, Kyle was cooled down, they were both tired and wanted to sleep but both of them didn't want to leave. Stan asked, "can I tell you something?" Kyle said, "okay, but I want to tell you something after, what is it?" Stan nodded and asked, "what were you fighting about with the person on the phone?" Kyle had an inkling that Stan would ask the question, "well, my Mom, she kicked me out of the house and then I had to move in with Cartman and he is shit, but the thing is that she wanted me to move back in, and I don't want to." Stan asked another question, "why'd she kick you out?" Stan's eyes grew sad as he asked it, "she didn't like what I said." Stan didn't even need to ask as Kyle continued, "I told her I was into guys and she wasn't having it." Kyle sighed sadly. "but, that's in the past, I need to tell you something."

 

Stan nodded, "it's about Wendy." Stan wondered what about and asked, "if you're saying she's a stuck up bitch, I already know." Kyle shook his head and said, "she's not good." Stan was about to question that but Kyle cut him off, "she's pretty toxic. I've only seen her for a couple of days and the way she treats you isn't good." "How?"  
"She threatens her life to get what she wants with you."  
"Yeah, but that's not..."  
"And she's manipulative, I've done some of my research and apparently you aren't allowed to talk to most of the girls in your school." "Well, yeah but that's because she gets jealous easily so."  
"But that's not how relationships work, it's about love and strength as long as believing the other person isn't cheating."  
"She knows I don't cheat she just gets jealous."  
"Trust, there's not a lot of trust in your relationship."

  
Stan shook his head, "you're wrong."  Kyle knew he would be mad, "think of it as an outsiders point of view, she threatened her life if you didn't get her something." Stan said, "and look at it in my view, she's wonderful and saved me a lot of times, I'd be dead without her." Kyle knew he wasn't getting anywhere so he stated, "look, it's late and we're both tired, I'm going back to my hotel, let's just sleep on it." Stan nodded as Kyle shut the door.

 

Kyle went into the hotel and sighed and fell on the bed.  He had to wake up at 5 in the morning to catch the flight.  He knew Stan wouldn't wake up at 4:30 just to say bye to him.


	9. Chapter 9

 

_You have 1 new message_

_Kenny_

Wait... so you're

_Cartman_

_You really kissed!  Fucking weirdo_

_**Stan**   
_

_**Why did you do that?** _

 

 **Stan:** Why did you do that?

 **Kyle:** I'm sorry, okay, I liked you and wanted to shoot my shot

 **Stan:** I don't, okay?  I don't like you.  Why the hell did you kiss me?  

 **Kyle:** Stan, I'm sorry, please forgive me

 **Stan:** I'm straight

 **Kyle:** I'm sorry

_The number you have tried to reach is no longer available_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for waiting for me to get my shit together and write this, I have rewarded you with something I think all of you have been waiting for. This time I do have an excuse for taking so long to write the chapter... I am writing an actual book with my own characters and an original plot. Will it be published? No, it's for fun and it's gay. Very very gay, well, it's actually between two girls but yeah, still very very gay. It's about college because college makes you gay. What am I saying? And I have no inspiration for this so I made a quick ending, albeit sad but still.


End file.
